Dead Rockers + Gnome = POSSIBLE

5:06 pm

It has recently come to my attention that a large amount of rock-stars have died in some type of vehicle accident, right when they're really makin' it. Take, Randy Rhoads. He played guitar for Ozzy Osbourne when he went solo. And soon enough, during one of their tours, boom. Dead. Apparently the dude who drove their bus stopped at an airplane hanger and took people for rides in one of the planes. Of course, they agreed no questions asked. Ok. This is after he had been driving at least 16 hours, and plus, he was probably drugged up, which kept him awake. Of course, they ended up crashing and killing everyone in it. Also, a couple of the band members of Lynyrd Skynrd (people who play Free Bird) Also died in a plane crash, during one of their tours, when they were at the peak of fame. As did the great guitarist Stevie Ray Vaughn. But, he did die in a helicopter accident. How do you do that anyway? At least in a plane you can get off course, and its a really big machine to maneuver. But all it takes to drive a helicopter is a guy with a stick attached to the floor. Mysterious?

This brings me to my conclusion. Conspiracy. My belief is there is some small evil elf or something that looks like the Travelocity Gnome. And he was bullied as a child (think of how short he was then, poor boy) by some guy who grew up to be a rock star, and now he's taking vengeance on everyone. Well, I cant deal with this goddamn rock star withdrawal. I think its time for him to hang up his little pointy Travelocity hat and stop while he's ahead, it's causing me too much strife. Oh, and I bet he pushed Keith Moon into that pool. He went for the legs, that's what you do with people who are tall.